After running and cleaning the house last night I decided to take a tub and watch the video for the second part of the Take Control course that I am working on. Pretty interesting segment. She had talked about how living to go from one daily task to the next daily task puts you in a place of just getting by. There is no real enrichment. This could be your daily tasks, the same routines with your kids. You're accomplishing things, but really your only doing what you need to do to get by. There is no real enrichment. After a while problems in your life start to build up, you focus on those problems, and before you know it you are in Coping mode and are exhausted. Once you're exhausted, you're burned out.
She had stated that based on a study from some fancy pants ivy league schools, that adding something enriching, such as a hobby that you love back into your life will aid in giving you enjoyment, giving you more purpose and over time helps to wash away the mundane, gives you more energy and gets you out of coping mode. This is really where I have been. Since before my divorce I was in coping mode, and going through divorce that coping mode was fast tracked to levels I had never been before. Because of the nature of the situation I got stuck there, frozen, and have been in coping mode since.
Since doing the record shop I have noticed that my energy has been coming back, and that I have found like I have purpose outside of my daily tasks. I guess I have more pep in my step. She showed the really great visual of a glass of dirty water, and she slowly poured a pitcher of blue water into the glass and over the course of about 20 seconds or so the blue water that flowed into the cup pushed all the muddy water out. It was a great visualization of how taking a few minutes a day to do something we enjoy (the blue water) can really add fulfillment and happiness to your life (the cup with the muddy water.)
She later got into the kinds of people that we are when it comes to end goals and aspirations. Some folks are dreamers, some folks are path layers. Each person has traits of each, but one of those are our "super power" and those super powers can compliment each other. I went through the workbook exercise and without a question (I already knew this) that I was a path layer. What I did learn is that the path layers are generally organized and know what steps you need to take to achieve a certain goal. The problem is that we can be so focused on each step that we can lose sight of the bigger picture. Tunnel vision. That got me reflecting on the the last few years of my life.
Being frozen in coping mode put me in tunnel vision + being a path layer & losing site of the big picture = Double Tunnel vision.
Let's put this into context of my life. I've been trying to recover from divorce and focus on the family that I had. I knew I wanted them as my family and for us to be a happy unit. However, being in coping mode, I had enough bandwidth to make it through day to day tasks. This put me in tunnel vision where I could only focus on that moment. Now, know my endgame with my family, being a path layer I would have steps to normally get from point A to point B looking at these steps through the first filter of tunnel vision made it so that I couldn't see or really comprehend the next step. This gave me my second filter of tunnel vision which, which added to more burnout and just totally got me lost.
Here's a stupid photo of me sitting down this morning to do my workbook after pacing around the house saying affirmation statements and having an out loud dialogue to my inner child.
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